What Does Marriage Mean? | Tracie Everyday: What Does Marriage Mean?

Thursday, May 29, 2014

What Does Marriage Mean?

What is marriage? For a long time I simply viewed it as a social construct that we have created in order to have structure. A legality that is not necessary. I always thought that I never wanted, nor needed marriage. I can have love, commitment, mutual respect, companionship.... you get the idea, I can have it all without marriage. So, how did I get to be less than 2 months out from my wedding, when I always thought that marriage is something I wanted, nor needed? That's a good question.

The Mister is almost ten years older than me. GASP! I know, old balls. Anywho, we both have lived very, very different lives. He went and had an adventure during his twenties, while I did what every good kid does and went to college/grad school. The Mister and I met while I was in grad school, so he saw me at my most broke, most stressed out. We started out "just dating" and somehow that turned into us meeting each other's parents and a year of dating. Then, we started talking about what to do when our leases were up (we lived in apartments next door to each other) after two years. I'm not sure how, but these two people who neither wanted nor needed marriage were now in a committed, long-term relationship are getting married. We both knew we wanted the same things for our future and that our futures involved each other. Then, one day The Mister came home and asked me to marry him. It wasn't something we had talked about. We had never discussed marriage, but we had talked about buying a house, new cars, everything else in life we were going to share.

So, what does marriage mean to me? At this point, it is a honest, true commitment to each other. It is a way that we are showing our love to each other. While the party itself is to involve our family and friends, the marriage itself is for us. We want each other and nobody else. Awww true love.

Oh, and it means that he can support my Target and shoe addiction. There are definite bonuses to this marriage business.

I'm just saying. 

What does marriage mean to you?


  1. i've never really believed in conventional things, marriage being one of them. i was always if it happened, it happened; if it didn't, it didn't. when i met my husband, i was perfectly content with being with him and didn't need a ring to know that he wanted to be with me; we just knew. that sounds really cliche but it's true. in fact, for the first 3 years of our relationship, i was so scared that he would propose!

    marriage is just a piece of paper (imo). even if we didn't get married, we'd still be together; i'd still have bought the house together and had a kid together.

    Vodka and Soda

  2. I think marriage to me just represents another step and formally committing to one another. I totally get why people just choose not to get married, but I think for me personally I would wonder why my now husband wouldn't want to take that step with me.

  3. ha, ha "old balls"...that made me laugh. I believe you can be committed without taking the legal steps but at the same time it means a lot to me to have taken that step and to be able to call him my husband. Plus there are certain credit, legal and tax benefits from doing the deed :)


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