March Review

Hmm... what did I do this month? I took a bunch of selfies, duh! I am that girl that takes stop light selfies, and I don't even care if you judge me.

 

 

 

 

I had Spring Break and didn't do much of anything that week. Holla! I attempted to drink a Raz-ber-Rita and a Mang-o-Rita. They are so gross it's not even funny, but I attempted. I still hearts me some Straw-ber-Rita thought, it just reminds me of college and putting vodka in my Sonic chery limeade. I still have some of that Bota Box left, which I was surprised by, then I realized I also drank bottles of wine. Yay, Spring Break!

 

 

 

I took both dogs to the vet. Why? Because dogs are stupid and have to be up to date on their shots. Oh, and Tigger has a tumor that has to get checked on the regs. Meaning, I spend hundreds of dollars for them to tell me he's still going to live. This time, I got smart and paid extra to not have to follow the boxers around to pick up the correct boxers poo, instead they totally did it for me at the vet. I don't ask how they did it, I just know that they did. Totally worth it. I do have to take the boxers seperately to the vet, because I can't handle two dogs in the waiting room by myself.

 

 

I also spent two entire days hanging out with this guy and his fabulous momma. I know I've mentioned Baby L before, but here he is right about 2 months old. He is as addicted to Scandal as me and his momma! We went out for sushi one day and then ordered pizza the next. They were the most relaxing 2 days ever!

 

 

Lastly, I saw a fox! Like, a legit fox! It ran out of my backyard and across the street in front of my car. I totally parked the car and sat there staring at it going, "that's a fucking fox. In my yard. A fucking fox is BOLD enough to be in the boxers yard?! He must want to die." The boxes are not especially friendly with unknowns in their yard, so I can only imagine what would happen if they all crossed paths. It would be like a pay-per-view WWE death match. Or look like Michael Vick's backyard.

 

 

What all did you do in March?

 

 

#Selfie

For the first time, I am linking up with Whitney from I Wore Yoga Pants to Work. I love to read her blog, all creeper status so I thought I'd actually particiapte this go round.   Let's #backthatazzup

Some Faves

I am probably one of the cheapest biotches around, but I love to look good. Which means that I am the ultimate bargain shopper! I thought I'd let you in on some of my fave of faves, so that you could share in the glory too. You can thank me later. 

Dress: Old Navy it comes in a variety of colors and is only $17 right now! They are also doing mystery savings, so you can get an extra percent off! I am usually ambivalent about Old Navy clothes, because I think most of their jeans look like mom jeans and the sizes all run different, but this dress was a definite keeper! It is soft, but not clingy and mine has a slit on one side so that you can still move but not show your cooter to the world. 

Necklace: Honest to goodness, this is a Forever 21 necklace, but I have been buying mine at Wally world. Don't judge me, bitches! They are only $5-$7 at Wally world and don't turn your neck green. I can't beat that. 

Fleece Lined Tights: Again, Wally world. I just can't help it, it's like walmart is attempting to be classy with all the new stuff they have. They are only about $5 per pair and come in a bunch of colors! These tights are fleeced lined, but not too thick, so they have been perfect for the in-between weather in Kansas City lately. They aren't leggings though, so don't get it twisted you have to still wear something over them! #leggingsarenotpants

Comb: I know it sounds weird, but this Conair Teasing Brush is the best thing ever! It's less than $3 and works! It has board bristles and a pointed end, which makes it perfect for parting and teasing your hair. This shit works. It doesn't seem to tear at my hair like plastic combs do and the boar bristles help to distribute oils, so that my hair doesn't look greasy. 

What are some of your favorites right now? 

Happiness Is...

What are some things that just make you happy? I always think about all the things I love to do when the weather starts getting better. Nice weather just makes you feel better-- about yourself and life.

Some things that make me feel good no matter what are:

• Porch Drinking I adore sitting on the back porch, in a beer garden, on a patio and drinking beer, wine, sangria, whatever! I love eating dinner on patios at restaurants and sitting by fire pits. If I can be out with the dogs while doing this even better! So far, I haven't found anywhere but my own backyard that allows this. If anyone knows anywhere in the KC area that allows dogs on their patio let me know. During the winter, I like to invite my friends over to couch drink, which is the indoor version of porch drinking :) 

• Tailgating going to ball games and grilling on our little crappy portable grill is the best! It's like porch drinking, but different. Here is the camaraderie of everyone wearing their team gear and being excited to see the opening pitch or doing the 7th inning stretch together. If you are lucky you may even win the Tailgate of the game! I have never had this happen, but one day I will! I have goals in life and winning a $25 grocery gift card is one of them!

• Clean Sheets as simple as this sounds having clean, fresh sheets makes me feel soooo good. Like willing to do the nasty good, but then the sheets would be dirty, so that's a no. 

• Haircuts I love getting my hair did. It always makes me feel so good and my hair always feels amazing. My hair always has so much body and has the fresh and clean feel. I can never recreate the same look and feel, even when I use the same products.

• Presents I purple, sparkly heart love buying presents for people. I like looking for things that will make others happy. I like seeing their smiles and knowing that they like their gifts. Don't get me wrong, I also love to get presents. The anticipation of not knowing and being excited makes me happy too. Essentially, I love presents!

What's Going On

We still have a whole in our kitchen wall. For the first two weeks I was so grossed out by it that I only ate prepackaged foods in the living room, i.e. I prepared nothing for myself and didn't eat in the kitchen/dining room. Now, more than a month later I am so over it. I know my ass is going to die of asbestos poisoning or some such shit and I don't give a fuck. The insurance company is working with us to fix it, but we are finding out that the previous owners had to have been aware of some of these leaks and just left it. So, until we know what the insurance company is going to pay for we are waiting on the repairs. It would help if Kansas wasn't such a bipolar bitch and stopped snowing and raining. Not only do we need the insurance approval for repairs we need everything to be dry!

Now, on to some good news. My knee is getting soooo much better! I had the MRI done and got a referral to a Bone and Joint specialist. Turns out, I have tendonitous, a fissure behind my knee, and a hardening plica band. That was mostly gibberish to me. Essentially, I have a crack in the muscle/tendons behind my knee and to protect itself it created swelling and the plica band is not something everyone has as an adult (it forms in the womb to help your knee forms then goes away) so when it starts to harden it makes it hard to move your knee and most people get them removed. Me? I decided on anti-immflamatories and physical therapy. Cuz we all know this bitch is going to be wearing high heels at her wedding! I have really been loving physical therapy, which surprises me. As odd as this sounds, Tigger knocking my knee out and doing physical therapy has motivated me again, Or, it could be the nicer weather peeking out. For almost two weeks I couldn't bend my knee and it was so swollen and had so much fluid behind the knee that I was couch bound. Now? I am able to press 40 lbs for 30 reps, ride a bike for 8 minutes, ride the elliptical for 5 minutes, and walk up to a mile. I also have a bunch of functional and strengthening exercises that I am doing everyday. My fave move? The clamshell. Mostly because of the name. Any cooter joke I'll take. 

What's been going on with you guys?

Still Here

I've spent the past few days just chilling and enjoying time with my friends. Lots of stuff going on, but I will definetely give you guys some updates soon! Oh, and I am still binge watching Scandal hard core and am on season 3 now. Anyone have any other show recommendations?

I am so late to the Scandal party

I am totally late to the Scandal party, but at the encouragement of my bloggy friend Dara I have started watching Scandal. I can't stop. Somebody help me. I sit in bed and watch it on my Ipad likes it my job. Thank sweet baby jesus I have Spring Break next week to binge watch Scandal.

Sh** Not to Say

 

Since it is Monday, my absolute favorite day of the week and I am slightly hangry right now I thought I would put together a list of Shit Not To Say. This is the shit that is guaranteed to piss me off. Even if I am chipper and have unicorns and rainbows flying through my head this shit sends me into an insta-rage.

 

• "I have nothing to wake up for." Well, you get to enjoy me every day. That should bring you enough life fulfillment for multiple lifetimes. Bitch, please. #firstworldproblems

• "I thought you'd already had your period this month." Call me a bitch again and see what happens. I'm crabby. Everybody gets crabby sometimes (please refer to the "I have nothing..." comment) and that should be allowed.

• "Why are you dressed so nicely?" Why? Because I go to work every day. Turns out, this is how big kids dress for work.

• "Is that what you are wearing?" Nope. I just put it on for fun. What the fuck do you think? Yes, I plan on wearing this. Or at least I did until you said that.

• "Oh, you're showering today?!" Really? Yes, I shower a-hole. Dry shampoo is made for a reason. No, I am not that nasty that I don't wash my cooter on the reg.

 

 

The Dog Behind the Dog

I told you guys about how I ended up with the love of my life, Tigger, here. Now, I thought I'd give you some insight into the first few months of living with my man. When I got Tig, I was living in a duplex with a sorority sister. We used the garage for our light up palm tree and a beer pong table. We also attempted to keep Tig there. That didn't work out so well. He ate through a panel in the garage door, ate the extension cord on the palm tree, and chewed on the wooden table legs of the beer pong table.

This is the picture of Tigger in the garage with his momma. He hated being in that garage unless we were all out there with him. So, I started crating Tigger. We soon found out that you can't put anything with Tigger. He is a dumbshit that eats everything.

Then, as graduation neared. I sent to Tig to live with his grandparents while I packed up the duplex and took my finals. The plan was that Tig and I would live with my parents while I took off a semester before starting grad school (I graduated in Dec and school started in Aug). 

Then, the unthinkable happened. When crated one day, Tig was given some towels to sleep on and a tennis ball to play with. When Tigger was let out of his crate, the only thing that was left was bits and pieces of a towel and rubber. He seemed fine. 

After almost two weeks of Tigger acting tired, not eating, and barfing up water we knew something was wrong. We took Tig to the emergency vet who did x-rays. Let me tell you, the emergency vet is NOT CHEAP. The x-rays showed that his stomach was so bloated they couldn't see any other organs. We were referred to an emergency surgical vet. 

In the end, part of the tennis ball had gotten stuck at the top of his intestine and created a blockage. There, pieces of towel were stuck. Thank goodness, they were able to "milk" the nastiness out and didn't have to remove any of his intestine. Instead, they cut open his tummy and removed the rubber and thread. YAY! Little baby T would live! 

 This part is not a sponsored part--- GET PET INSURANCE. That shit is worth it. I got a pound puppy for $160 (that included getting his balls chopped) and spent more than 3 grand on surgeries roughly three months later. He was a bargain.

Have you guys ever had a pet emergency? What happened?

Honeymoon aka I Have to Wear a Bikini

So, we finally decided on where we are going for our honeymoon. It was one of the only things that the Mr. had an opinion on. He used to be a scuba instructor in Florida and has traveled all over the place. We really wanted to go some place that he hasn't been before, so that we could build an experience and memories together. And let's be honest, my dream is to be half nakey in a hut over the water. Again, let's be honest only a reality tv star can afford that shit. So, without further ado. We are going to Cabo San Lucas! Most places are new to me, as I have only been to Cancun and on a cruise, and Gabriel hasn't been to the Pacific. So, it's a budget friendly win-win.

Here are a few things that I can't wait to do... You know, besides the being half nakey in a bikini thing.

• Sunset cruise in the San Lucas Bay: ride on a 60 foot yacht around the beautiful San Lucas Bay. For two hours, you get to enjoy the sunset, a cocktail and the amazing view of Land's End Arch.
• Snorkeling at Chileno Bay or Santa Maria: enjoy the Pacific ocean on an underwater adventure! 
• Cabo Dolphins: kiss and love on our dolphin friends! (can you tell I made this description up?) 
• Visit Cabo Wabo: I LOVE SAMMY HAGAR! 

Have you ever been to Cabo? What do you recommend?